to beer or not to beer?

today, i thought you were actually nice. nice, not just in words, but in deed. you gave me ur lighter, but i declined. i would have loved to keep it pra katulad ng dati... our so-called friendship started with me having possesion of ur lighter. hehe:) u held my hand that night... but that has not happend for some time now...

u know what? im confused. i dunno if we are ok. i dunno if there is still the concept of u&i. ur nice and all, but i dont get the same kind of warmth anymore. you still seem to care, yet sometimes you dont. i dunno if youre bitter angst keeps you from going back to ur old self and that ur really letting me go... that's why i ask: how do you hold on to someone who is in fact letting you go?

my nega thoughts caught up with me kanina... i wrote down some of my thoughts. most of the page was spent on saying sorry. i just felt sorry... for you, for me, for the concept of u&i. the flow of the words did not really stop until i wrote down the words: i'm letting you go.

then i turned my phone off kasi di ka pa nagrereply. i read some. i felt better... happier... or light, i guess. then i could not focus on what i was reading. i turned on the phone. and voila! may reply ka nga... ngtx tayo konti, then i had the sudden urge to say: namiss na baya taka *** uie...

and there goes my firm resolve to let you go. whatta looozer. but the thing is, di na ikinasama ng loob ko ang di mo pagreply... ok nang nasabi ko sayo. bahala ka na anong reaction mo dun. feeling ko at this point, i dont care what happens anymore. i feel so tired... so exhausted. i just want you to decide... if i should stay or i should go.

i just want it in black and white. sure, there could be broken hearts but then we adhere to dura lex sed lex... and there will always be songs for the beautifully wrecKEd souls to help us get through each day, right? you could sing "miss you love" by silver chair... i could sing "linger" by the cranberries... or together, we could sing "kiss me throught the phone" by souljaboy.

ciao!
peace and love!
god bless!

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ps, i'll always care deeply for you.
you'll always be a good friend of mine.