mad bitch disease

so i asked you how u were. n u said u were fine. but then u asked if i was mad at you. i said no. i was not mad. if i was not myself it was because i was feeling a mixture of these feelings: frustrated, doubtful, sad, kinda lonely and missing u very badly. i assured u i was not mad, and added that "if there is anything wrong with me, it would be rooted on the fact that i miss you very badly. pero ok lang, ganun naman talaga. hehe"

because i do! damnit! i have been tryin sooo hard not t feel it or to acknowledge it, but now i give up... i'm telling you, i miss you. i was trying to train myself na hindi ka na itxt as much or bawasan yung paglambing or pag express ko ng care. i have been trying to prepare myself for something like "the end" kasi u have been out of it or off lately. basically, i excerted less effort and now you think i am mad at you. im not. im mainly frustrated kasi i miss you and you are not doing anything about it. gusto ko sana mageffort ka konti. i want you to want to be with me. i know i cannot ask you for it. i cannot bring myself to ask you. i just really want you to want it for yourself. but maybe you dont... you no longer do.

you did not even reply to my lengthy txt which had a couple of pakyoot jokes in it. you could not even bring yourself to say you miss me.

then why the F@#$ do you care if im mad at you?! amiw. *now im mad*

peace and love!
ciao!